Friday, November 28, 2008

I'm all shook up

I've been having some troubles at school. Mostly with the teachers finding fault with my children, and then implying I'm being 'difficult' when I don't see the problem. To be clear: I always see problems everywhere! Show me a molehill and I'll make a mountain of it. But sometimes I honestly do not see the problem, so I can't do anything about it. As dr.Phil always says: 'You have to own the problem!' Well I don't, and I don't wanna borrow it either!

Today I made the mistake of asking one of the teachers an innocent question and she released some pent up frustrations, telling me I was being 'difficult' and wasn't acknowledging the problem with my son Jan. We parted on seemingly good terms, but when I left the building I could feel tears burning.

I feel as if these last weeks life has been shaking me around, and I feel unbalanced and unsure of where I'm going and who I'm supposed to be.There are times when I think I've found my footing, but then something happens and there I go again.

I don't like feeling down in the dumps and I find myself trying to think my way out of it. But then I think: 'Just let it be. Maybe you're supposed to learn something and this is God's way of helping you do that.'

And I think that maybe this melancholy feeling is like a walk through the desert. If so, I'll just have to continue on this journey through the desert until I reach the promised land.

Suddenly, this Beatles song popped into my head:

'When I find yourself in times of trouble,
Mother Mary comes to me, speaking words of wisdom.
Let it be, let it be. Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be,
There will be an answer, let it be, let it be.'

So I suppose that's what I'll do: I'll let my melancholy feelings be.


Jennielee said...

I understand. Usualy when a teacher calls me with a problem my son is causing in school I come down on him with the fury of all hell, but when a teacher told me he was sent to the principals office for refusing to hold hands in circle time, and my son later tells me that the boy had just coughed into his hand It is the teacher that is the problem. Teachers make life more difficult for parents when they undo lessons that we have spent years trying to drive into our children. (like to avoid germs because doctors are expensive).

maria said...

well, who does? i don't want to own or even borrow a problem, lol. seriously, i see your point and i agree with jennielee.

when my daughter was in 3rd grade, during the ptc, the teacher told me that all her students got a low grade in math, i said " maybe, you're the problem and not the children." when everybody is getting a low grade it only means that she's not as effective, right?

thanks for adding my badge here, i've also added yours. :)

take care.

Leanne said...

Wow. I was meant to find you today.

I had the same thing happen this weekend but with another Mom, who commented on my child.

I didn't know her, she didn't know me or my youngest, who at the time was having a HUGE temper tantrum and yeah, she is eight and too old.

I left the building, got into my car and burst into tears.


Let it be, stand your ground and remember YOU know them best and what is best for your kids. Not the teacher.

Also the tears? Kinda cathartic don't ya think?

Relimom said...

Thanks so much for your heartening comments!

It often amazes me how vulnerable having children has made me. I can't shield myself against the worries and pain when something happens concerning them.

But crying indeed ís cathartic.

Mandy @ Adventures of a Millennium Mom said...

It sounds like that teacher was being very insensitive. I don't blame you for being upset! I used to teach and I never would have talked to a parent that way...

relimom said...

Thank you Mandy! That's really good to hear.


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